Confessions of a Dangerous Mind

An attempt was made on my life this morning. Who? The Mallu Illuminati or we can call them Malluminati. I had tweeted about a mallu conspiracy to take over the world a couple of weeks back. Strictly. For. Fun. Being jobless can be a bitch at times. Some people found my previous post in accordance with the theory and even warned me that I might have strange visitors at night. Remember! Tweets are to be parsed bottom-up! flyyoufools says: @rockus So you found the clues about the Mallu Illuminati's plan for world domination? Expect a strange visitor tonight, and wont be zoozoos rockus says: Yup! Draft still there! New post: Zoozoo and a perverted Mallu. Previous post. I skipped town on that weekend and left for Thrissur. I think the baby who was with me in the coupe was a malluminati mole. Picture is indicative. From here . Imagine this kid when he is 6 months old with the same expression. You get the idea! So I land in Thrissur. More on the trip later. We have more pressing issu...

I am a big fan of the Vodafone Zoozoo ads. Fabulous job done by O&M. I was awed when I got to know that these critters are actually live action and not animation. Confession: After I got to know that these Zoozoos are young ladies in a fancy outfit, I have been fantasizing about them! Any outfits available for some kinky time in bed? Heck by the look of my love life I should get a zoozoo blowup doll instead! Okay. I'll stop turning you off. And yeah...these Zoozoos are mallus. Closely listen to what the male Zoozoo is saying. Scene 1: Parotta, Parotta, Parotta Scene 2: At 0:15 Puttum Kadalem Scene 3: Kappa-Meen, Kappa-Meen, Kappa-Meen All three would be familiar to any self respecting mallu out there. Three of our favourite dishes! If not, pics follow for your amnesiac brains: Some links for all the Zoozoo voyeurs...err...fans out there: Zoozoo Facebook Fan Club Vodafone IPL minisite which features Zoozoos extensively Zoozoo twitter feed which is pretty much useless Leaving for...

Being in Bangalore its not tough to run into mallus. In fact, its easier to get run over by them! That said, its much easier to recognize them to avoid problems like: Being embarassed after passing lewd comments at mallu girls. Being chased by mallu boyfriends/brothers after passing lewd comments at the girls. Girls in this case need not be mallu. Being an ass after speaking to shopkeepers in your broken hindi only to discover them reading 'Mathrubhumi'. Demonstrated instance: A student sang the song 'Ek Do Teen...' in his mind to confirm the hindi for 12 while buying stuff, only to be stunned by shopkeepers response in Malayalam. That particular student currently writes awesome blog posts! Being locked up by the Police for swearing in Malayalam not realizing the constable himself is a mallu. The list is practically endless. My roomie often boasts that he can recognize mallus at sight and he has a 100% track record. Though I was apprehensive about it, I have to say he h...