Confessions of a Dangerous Mind

Sound of heavy metal ringing in my ears... Loud...Very loud...still not enough to smother my mind from thinking...thoughts that make me uneasy...depressed... Judas Priest...ironic name...Worshipper of Judas...the caretaker of Judas...whatever...betrayal of the divine...the divine and pure half of my self... Rains lashing outside...or is it over? Anyway its cold...switching off the fan has done no good...its hot now...stuffiness rather. Heat seems to be seething from within...brain is going numb and active intermittently (Nah, I am not drunk!) A shadow...a big shadow looms over my heart...gnawing me...pricking me...a bloodless torture... Need more air...need my oxygen...where is it? Switched the music to Enya...will it help?

5.Metallica-The Black Album This album brought metal to mainstream. May be a little ligher than their earlier material, but this is one kickass album. Song after song, classic metal stuff in one song. Enter Sandman... Sad but True... Where ever I may roam... The Unforgiven... 4. Guns N Roses-Appetite for Destruction The best selling debut album of all time! It brought about the then 'Worlds most dangerous band' tag to GnR... A great hard rock album... All the songs kick ass with the rawness and attitude... Sex, Drugs and Rock N Roll unleashed in all its glory! My favourite is Sweet Child O Mine...one of the greatest ballads of all time... GNR could never get better than this. This raised the bar a trifle too much! 3.Cream- I Feel Free-Ultimate Cream I was in two minds here...Whether to put Disraeli Gears or this one... I got DG pretty recently and lost it in the hard drive crash. But this one's been with me for a long time. I know its not nice to mention a compilation, but ...

I finished reading Zahir last week. A great book. This is the second book that I have read of Paulo Coelho, the first being Alchemist. The book is written from a first person point of view. Spiritual as you may expect. This novel deals with obsession (that is somewhat the meaning of Zahir (an Arabic word)), love and happiness. The author gives us a lot of food for thought. What is happiness? I have been asking this myself for a long time. What defines a happy state? Sure, I am not saying that I am a dumb loser who is bawling all the time. Still, when I think about my happy times... Winning something. I confess, it gives me a big rush. But then again, also a sense of insecurity. I have to keep up with this or else I would be booed. (Booed by who? That's another question altogether.) Being with my loved ones. The very antagonistic...Not being with them...Losing them forever...Creeps up when I sink into being happy. Sharing my thoughts with special people in the wee hours of the night...

Dear Friends If you have'nt read this , this and this, please don't. They are filled with untruth and may harm your good hearts. Atleast this is said to be the final post in this series (Me: For now! >:) ) Pappu P.S: I am coming home on 19th. So savour this blog for now...it may not be updated after that... Time: Lunch Break Venue: Class Pappu and his friends are waiting for the dame to come... Finally she arrives... Pappu looks at her...she bats her eyelashes...and smiles at him....Neo winks at him and urges him ownwards...the ladies pep him up... Finally... Pappu: errr...hmmm...err... Garfield: Want to go to bathroom? Pappu: (in his trademark husky voice) Dame... Dame: *bats her eyelashes...approaches* Pappu: *legs failing* Garfield to others: I think he is gonna shit here and now! Pappu: (in his trademarked husky voice) Dame... Dame:*still batting her eyelashes* Yes... Pappu: Dame... Dame:*now batting of eyelashes is a little slowed down* Yes... Neo prods Pappu Pappu: ...